New Kid on the Block

Apparently, my desire to name and claim the douchery of others is a generic defect (super-power?), because my brother has decided to get in on the action with the brand-spanking new Blog of Douche Bags. Apparently, he didn't get the memo that Pandas had already invented the Douche-tastic Scale, which even sought to quantify the levels of douchery one person could attain. But alas, there is room in the internet machine for more than one douche-outer (unless there is not enough room in which case, who rules Barter Town? I rule Barter Town). And so, I suggest we return to our anti-doucheing ways.
Since today is such a historical day with the whole Berlin Wall Thingy, I suggest we develop a new category called Douches of History. Any suggestions? With your suggestion, be sure to put him or her on a 1-10 scale of douchery. Also, let's not just assume that Hitler is a 10, I mean, he's getting to be like J.K. Rowling was when they had to develop a new Children's Lit Best Seller List just because she was always on top of the regular list. She can't ALWAYS win, right?

Happy 20th Birthday to a Unified Berlin

Twenty years ago today the Berlin Wall came down. I remember this event with particular clarity because we had a German exchange student from Hamburg living with us at the time. I have seen few people in my life as happy as he was on that day. However, not everything has been peachy since 9 November 1989 For a parallax view on the event, check out Slavoj Zizek's op-ed piece in today's New York Times. Oh, big al and FR, did I mention I went to a Zizek lecture last month and got his new book for free? I think I did but I figured I would bring it up again.

Edward Sharpe & The Magnetic Zeros

I love the way these guys (and girls) perform live shows. So much fun. They are playing this week in NYC but, unfortunately, the show is sold out.

Saving the Earth or Saving Face?

Al Gore was on The Daily Show on Wednesday. Jon Stewart was surprisingly critical, which I kinda enjoyed. However, I could not get passed Al's face. Did he get a face lift?

my new fave

I love how this guy's political commentary can be both snarky/sarcastic and insightful at the same time. You should read his blog.

"With the emboldened Teabagging movement slowly devouring the GOP, Democratic victories are starting to feel less like one army defeating another and more like an army firing tear gas into a disorganized mob."

http://www.ginandtacos.com/

Try Hiding in a Cave...

I think I inadvertently stumbled onto the answer to our problems in Afghanistan. Reading a friend's news item and rumination upon bears, I found this tidbit:

A bear killed two militants after discovering them in its den in Indian-administered Kashmir, police say.
Two other militants escaped, one of them badly wounded, after the attack in Kulgam district, south of Srinagar.
The militants had assault rifles but were taken by surprise - police found the remains of pudding they had made to eat when the bear attacked.

Now, there are about 12.3 things I'd like to say about this. First, pudding? Read that last sentence again... "police found the remains of pudding..." what the hell is the remains of pudding? When you attack pudding, what remains is pudding... just less of it. And what kind of self-respecting militant eats pudding? Did Bill Cosby go ape-sh*t and decide to fight the system by trading his sweaters for a Chapan?
The second thing I'd like to say is that I think there is something in this bear thing. What if we shipped a thousand bears to the Waziristan region of Afghanistan? Try hiding in a cave when there are a thousand drugged up, homeless bears looking for a place to sleep. Knock, knock, who's there? Bears and they're gonna eat your pudding.

We Are Douchebags

Can Weezer Fall Further from My Grace?

Happy Wednesday

From The Onion, from a long time ago...


Prague's Franz Kafka International Named World's Most Alienating Airport

Lazer Science News

In more news of scientists using their powers for banality and not for good, scientists are trying to use lasers to keep planes from colliding. BOOOORING. Seriously, how many planes collide a year? 4? How many times does a single person think to his or herself, "man, I could really go for a 1/3 patty of beef cooked by a beam of pure energy!" 453.
Seriously, scientists, get off your lazy asses and start making a laser beam that can cook a hamburger. Enough with the bullsh*t.

Election Day

It's election day, and you're thinking, "What do I look for in a candidate for the Parks Board?" Well, you could go for corporate experience, because nothing says, "I know how to take care of the average person" like years of bilking the average person for the sake of a few rich elite investors. Or, you could choose someone for ideological reasons, for example, you don't want gay, abortion doctors in our city parks. But when it comes to voting for a Mayor, you want something awesome. Or you just want awesome. Why not choose Joey for Mayor then? As his bio says, "Unlike other politicians, Joey has no experience and is thus unable to have become corrupted. Furthermore, Joey has a proven record of awesomeness that can be counted on should the city face natural disaster, war, famine, Act of God, or any of a hundred other things that other candiates (sic) aren't busy thinking about.
Should Joey be elected this year, he will be sure to express his gratitude by humbly taking office and putting his years of playing Sim City to use. He'll not only improve the city but will do so with a smile."

Who Said Taking the Bus Wasn't Cool?

Whales are Smug

Stop it. Stop laughing. Seriously, whales, I don't know what you think you saw, but you can stop with this whole smug schtick. What, you think you're better than me? You know what whales, f*ck you. I don't need your undersea airs and I'm tired of your crap. Asses.